THE BEER BOTTLE SONG

Try remembering them after you've had 63 bottles of beer

from the wall!!

RAIN...& RAIN...& RAIN...

Ugh, for three days straight! (so far) Which really sucks in Florida. It doesn't usually rain like this down here. Of course, for months there's been hardly any rain at all, so everybody talks about "gee, we really need the rain". Not me, I figure the more rain, the faster the grass grows and the more I have to cut the lawn.
Do you want to know what this rain is like? Well, it's like...

Springtime in Connecticut!!
(except warmer)

FLYING

I hate to fly.

Yep, sure do. Not that I always did, I actually used to enjoy it. Of course, that was back when planes were a bit more than sardine cans with wings. You actually used to be able to breathe on planes! Not only in, but also out! Got back Friday from a business trip to Greensboro, NC; what fun, 6 hours of travel for approximately 1-1/2 hours of actual flying time. And so crammed together (6 across on a plane I know was originally made for 4 across) that my left arm got spasms from being wedged against the side of the plane. OUCH!

Nothing like the old days when I used to take 747s across the Atlantic to England and back; Pan Am flights 1 & 2, depending on which way you were traveling. And even 20 - 25 years ago when the whole family used to fly to Canada; the planes were comfortable and the stewardesses were pretty, and friendly. The only plus? Well, at least if you get stranded somewhere, the airports have shops and restaurants that are open late. We once got stranded in Seattle/Tacoma Airport for 6 hours on a Sunday afternoon/evening; no stores or restaurants open, and most of the airport lights were turned off! Boy, that was fun, especially with 2 young children.

Yeah, so much for the good old days, but at least I don't have to fly much anymore - next time just hand me a doobie, brother!

KETCHUP VS MUSTARD

Another sign that President Obama is an elitist Muslim terrorist: The President ordered a cheeseburger with Dijon mustard. "What kind of man orders a cheeseburger without ketchup but Dijon mustard?" asked Laura Ingraham after the president's visit to an Arlington, Virginia burger joint with Vice President Joe Biden. Sean Hannity played a Grey Poupon commercial and said "I hope you enjoyed that fancy burger, Mr. President." Mark Steyn, filling in for Rush Limbaugh, said Obama was trying "to enlighten us" through his order.

(with thanks to the Wailing List)

 

Boy, those Republicans/Conservatives/Whateverthehelltheyare just don't get it. Record unemployment, businesses failing, economioc crises, global warming, and all the other shit 8 years of Republicanism left us, and all they can do is complain about condiments!!

Do they even know what condiments are, or do they think it has something to do with safe sex...?

SPEAKING OF SWINE FLU...

...Don't you wish you had a pet pig who would slice himself into sausage for you? And with a smile on his face!

PROOF OF GLOBAL WARMING

OUCH! MY HEAD...

So yesterday I had this terrible headache, thought my head was going to explode; it was so bad I left work early. Came back to work today, seems to have gone away.

But my son Corey told me it was probably because I finally filled up my head with trivial knowledge and ran out of room in my brain...

(Hey, it could happen)

WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?

My guess? NOT put his image on a license plate! Oh, yes, the Florida legislature is voting on new license plates this week, one of which will have an image of Jesus on it. Which begs the question...which image of Jesus would they use, 40s movies, 70s movies, shroud of Turin?
And speaking of license plates, I've noticed lately that the some of the standard design Florida plates now say "In God We Trust" in place of the County name. Not sure if I'd want that on my license plate, irregardless of whether I actually believe in god or not, I certainly wouldn't trust one who allowed child molestings, murders, and mass killings to happen.
(So thank god we don't need gun control...)

IT'S A SMALL WORLD (MAYBE)

It's a Ryley world after all

it's a Ryley world after all

it's a Ryley world after all

don't know why they call it small...

So, we got to go to Magic Kingdom with Ryley this past weekend, and of course his favorite ride was Small World (which I remember from the 1964 World's Fair) and we had to do it twice. And the figures seem about Ryley's size (just under 3') so they're not small to him(hence the reworking of the theme song...). Yeah, it was so much fun,

though my feet still hurt...

OCTOMOM TRADEMARKS SELF

Nadya Suleman, America's favorite mother of octuplets, is seeking to trademark her media nickname "Octomom" in order sell baby goods and a TV show.

Nuff said!